I decided to post what I posted on a forum that I am a member of. Its the story of my pregnancy and birth of my child.
My name is Michele. I am happily married to the love of my life, Daniel. We have been married since July 26, 2008. We are strong Christians, and are very active in our church. I sing on our Praise& Worship team, and dance on the dance team. Daniel is the Minister of Music and is on the drama team. We also have a singing group with 2 two cds out. We are currently working on our 3rd cd. We decided we wanted to have a baby in 2010. We got pregnant in April, due Dec. 31st. We barely made it!!! At 19 weeks, we found out that we were having a baby boy. At the ultrasound, my doctor told us there were some concerns because the babys limbs were short and scheduled us another ultrasound. It was there at that ultrasound that we found out that our son had a lethal syndrome called Short Rib Polydactyly. The doctor told us that there are no survivors of the syndrome, that the baby would probably die within a few hours after birth if he didn't die in utero before then. He offered to abort. We said no of course. We are people of faith, and so we began to pray that the Lord would give us more time with him, but that no matter what happened, that he would give us the peace and comfort we would need. Throughout the remainder of the pregnancy, He gave us a peace beyond our understanding. Most of our family and church had no idea what was really going on because we had so much strength and peace. At each doctors appt, the doctors would always be surprised that our son, who we called Jarrett, was becoming more and more active, and his heartbeat always stronger. Instead of slowly dying as they had believed, he was progressing like any normal baby. As I got closer to my due date, my doctor began to talk to us about what we wanted to do once Jarrett was born. Medically, there would be no way for him to be able to breathe outside utero because his rib cage was too small, therefore restricting his lungs from growing fully. Even on the highest support ventilator, he wouldn't be able to stand it too long cuz, since his lungs would be too small, they wouldn't be able to hold the pressure from the ventilator after a while. They said his lungs would eventually give out. This was among other problems affecting his ability to live, such as heart, liver, and kidney problems. This was all told to us repeatedly over the remainder of the months of pregnancy. So they gave us options: we could do what they called Comfort Care, which was just hold our son after he was born, until he eventually passed, which would be after a few hours. Or they could intibate (sp?) him so we could have him with us a little longer ( 24 hrs at the most). We chose the latter option. On my birthday, Dec.17th, I went into labor at 6:30pm. It was a very smooth labor and Jarrett was born Dec.18th at 5:15am. They immediately intibate him and took him away. At 6:30am, the pediatrician assigned to him came and told us that his levels were too low, and that he would be gone by 7am at the latest. We began to pray for more time with him. We knew that God is more powerful than any machine, and we needed a miracle from Him. He performed one. Jarretts levels began to increase more and more that day. When I was taken down to see him, I began to talk to him and he opened his eyes for the first time. It was a beautiful moment. The next day the doctor came in and told us that he still probably wouldn't be here in a couple days, and to expect his levels and numbers to steadily decline. Since our faith is not in the words of the doctors, but in God, we sought Him for help. Over the next few days his numbers began to increase. The nurses were all amazed that Jarretts vital signs would show improvement just by Daniel and I talking, singing, and praying in his room next to his incubator. That week we were allowed to hold him, and even change his diaper. He became a very popular baby in the NICU. Nurses that weren't even assigned to him came by to meet the little "fighter" as they called him. We met a few who joined in with us in prayer for more time with our son. We found out later that even when some of them weren't on duty, they would call and ask about him. Daniel and I had signed a DNR because the doctor explained to us, that all of their attempts at saving him if he were to start dying would be futile. We didn't want him to go through any unnecessary pain and we knew that when it came down to that point, it meant God was ready to take him. For 21 days, we got to know our son, hold our son, love on our son, and see that he loved his mommy and daddy too. We could see that he was like his daddy, and didn't like to be touched on his feet at all. He looked like his daddy in my opinion but because of his skin color, I think, most people said he looked like me. We had so much favor, the hospital nurses allowed us to stay in our room as long as we needed too and discharged us so we wouldn't be charged for it. Jarrett became the nurses baby. During our stay there, we got to know six nurses who said their lives were changed by our faith in our God, and Jarretts will to live. On Jan 8th God took Jarrett to be with Him. That week he had slowly started to decline, so we knew our time with him was coming to an end. I wasn't really ready to let him go yet. At one point I was holding him and all of a sudden we noticed that his heartrate was rapidly declining. I began to cry and simply said, "Im not ready yet" and immediately his heartrate began to jump back up, much to the amazement of the nurses and doctors. We went home Friday, Jan 7th to get some rest that night. The Lord gave us peace and rest that night. Early that morning we got the call that his heartrate was decreasing again. This time we were ready to let him go. On he way to the hospital, I told Daniel that this was it. Multiple times during the night I had awoke with an intense feeling of sadness and when we got up hat morning, I just knew that this was the day. We arrived at the hospital. I wanted to hold him, so they placed him in my arms. We asked for them to turn the monitors away from us. We spent Jarretts last hour of life holding him, singing and talking to him. At 11:25, our son died in my arms. It was the hardest moment of my life. I wouldn't take back a single moment. His home going was Jan 11. We held an actual service for him because we wanted to celebrate the time that we had with him. The nurses even came to the funeral and spoke of how amazed they were at the miracle they witnessed. They all knew that it was nothing but God that sustained our baby. Medically speaking, there was no hope for him, but God proved that he doesn't need medicine and technology to prove how powerful he is. One of the nurses looked up the meaning of the name Daniel Jarrett. After researching, she found out that his name means Brave Spiritual Warrior. I wrote this not to give credit to myself. Everyone is so amazed at Daniel and my strength throughout this entire process. But we give glory and honor to God. Because we truly wouldn't have made it through this without His peace, comfort, and grace he gave us. He honored our request and allowed us to get to know our son. And now we have an advocate for us already in heaven. Our son is now resting in the arms of Our Father, free from all pain and suffering. We miss him terribly. I share this story for all those who are also suffering through loss. Allow God to comfort you. Don't try to sit in your grief alone. Lift your eyes to the Father and ask Him for help. I am a witness, He will comfort you. There are days when I literally feel like I can't go on, and I ask, Why Lord? But I know Gods will has a great purpose in our lives, and the lives of those who hear about our story. He wouldn't have allowed us to go through this unless He knew we were strong enough to handle it. He used us so we can be a testimony of just how great our God is.
