14 weeks 6 days
I have been incredibly busy and sick. Well mostly just busy. My last post I talked about my sister coming down. Well that was last week, and even though she stayed over at my other sisters house (she was supposed to stay at mine, but long story, she didnt) I spent most of the time she was here over there. Then our insurance decided that they didnt want to keep paying for a prescription of Zofran every 12 days, so I went without it for a few days. It was awful! I felt awful and I was even throwing up one day because I was so incredibly sick. We got my doctor to change my dosage to 30 in a pack instead of 12! After all that Daniel and I went out of town to sing for a friends family reunion. We left on Saturday and stayed until Monday, Memorial Day. Today has also been extremely busy. I am planning a wedding for my friend, and we worked on the wedding website pretty much until about an hour ago.
So thats been my life for the past week and a half lol. On a pregnancy note, aside from my days without the miracle drug, I have been feeling good. I am already sick of eating! And I have a long ways to go still! I think I have been feeling the baby move. I havent told anyone but Daniel and my mom because I know everyone will just think that its gas. But, I have had gas from jump and I know exactly what it feels like, and it doesnt feel like little flutters! I guess I will know for sure in a few weeks!
I will be 15 weeks tomorrow, and so at my doctors appointment next week, I am going to see if I can schedule the ultrasound for 17 weeks instead of 18. Why wait another week?? I am so excited to see what we are having. Daniel wants a girl, and I think I do too. I guess we will see!
I had my byopsy scheduled for last Friday the 27th but they ended up being way behind and when we got there the receptionist said that we would have to wait about 1 1/2 hours so we rescheduled for next Friday instead. I think that just about sums up everything so far.
WAIT!!!! Great news. After Jarrett died, I met someone online whose baby girl had died in September to something a little similar to what Jarrett had. She has been trying to get pregnant since the beginning of this year. Well, after a few disappointments, she finally got her a Big Fat Positive last Sunday!!!!!Official due date is at the end of January. Im so excited and happy for her!!!!!
Now, I think Im done :)
Till next time!
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Blaaahhh!!!
12 weeks 6 days
Im sooooo tired!!!!! That is all..................................
Ok, well, not really. I guess I have some other stuff to say. Good news! Tomorrow I will officially be in my second trimester!!!! Whoooooooooo hooooooo!!!!!!!!! Im so happy and excited!! I just have two more to goooooo!! HA!!
The baby is doing well. I had a doctors appointment last Monday and the heartbeat was 167. My next one is June 6. Its flying by! Im so ready to have another beautiful baby to hold. 5 more weeks until we find out what were having!!!!!!!! I am undecisive as too which gender I prefer. I just want a healthy baby!
Speaking of health, my doctor found a lump on my throat. She sent me to a family physician, who sent me to a thyroid specialist, who then, sent me to get a ultrasound done! Lol three appointments in one week. I never want to do that again!
Turns out that its a hard mass and I have to have a byopsy scheduled to drain the fluid out. The procedure seems to be a simple one: they will numb the area on my throat and stick a tiny needle in to drain the fluid. Its supposed to be painless, but that doesnt mean that Im not freaking out just a little bit about them sticking a needle in my throat. I HATE needles!!!!
No one has called me back yet with the date of the byopsy yet, so I sitll dont know when it will be. But, Im really not to worried because I have prayed about it and I know the Lord is in control!
One of my sisters is coming to stay with us this weekend! So very excited!!! I havent seen her since a few days after Jarretts funeral.
Ok, wait, quick history lesson: My parents have 5 kids! The oldest lives down here with me and she is married with 3 kids. Then I came. Then the next girl, who is coming down here this weekend. Then the one and only boy, and last but not least, my baby sister who is graduating high school this weekend. Every body but, the oldest and I, live in Alburquerque, New Mexico. Thats actually how Daniel and I met. But more about that later :)
That is all for now. Im going to go and lay down and think about all the things I should be doing instead!
Im sooooo tired!!!!! That is all..................................
Ok, well, not really. I guess I have some other stuff to say. Good news! Tomorrow I will officially be in my second trimester!!!! Whoooooooooo hooooooo!!!!!!!!! Im so happy and excited!! I just have two more to goooooo!! HA!!
The baby is doing well. I had a doctors appointment last Monday and the heartbeat was 167. My next one is June 6. Its flying by! Im so ready to have another beautiful baby to hold. 5 more weeks until we find out what were having!!!!!!!! I am undecisive as too which gender I prefer. I just want a healthy baby!
Speaking of health, my doctor found a lump on my throat. She sent me to a family physician, who sent me to a thyroid specialist, who then, sent me to get a ultrasound done! Lol three appointments in one week. I never want to do that again!
Turns out that its a hard mass and I have to have a byopsy scheduled to drain the fluid out. The procedure seems to be a simple one: they will numb the area on my throat and stick a tiny needle in to drain the fluid. Its supposed to be painless, but that doesnt mean that Im not freaking out just a little bit about them sticking a needle in my throat. I HATE needles!!!!
No one has called me back yet with the date of the byopsy yet, so I sitll dont know when it will be. But, Im really not to worried because I have prayed about it and I know the Lord is in control!
One of my sisters is coming to stay with us this weekend! So very excited!!! I havent seen her since a few days after Jarretts funeral.
Ok, wait, quick history lesson: My parents have 5 kids! The oldest lives down here with me and she is married with 3 kids. Then I came. Then the next girl, who is coming down here this weekend. Then the one and only boy, and last but not least, my baby sister who is graduating high school this weekend. Every body but, the oldest and I, live in Alburquerque, New Mexico. Thats actually how Daniel and I met. But more about that later :)
That is all for now. Im going to go and lay down and think about all the things I should be doing instead!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Lol look at this!!!
This picture shows either just how small I was during my last pregnancy, or just how big I already am this pregnancy.
The first image is this pregnancy and the next one is last pregnancy.
I am almost the same size already lol. This was too crazy to me so I had to share lol
I am almost the same size already lol. This was too crazy to me so I had to share lol
Mothers Day
11 weeks 6 days
Well, Mothers Day for me was very hard. Jarrett died on the 8th of January, so the 8th of every month has been hard. So the fact that Mothers Day fell on the 8th didnt help things at all. I woke up feeling very depressed. Daniel was already up when I finally woke up, so I just laid in the bed and cried and cried. I was overcome by feelings of grief. I wanted Jarrett in my arms so bad! I knew that this was a day that I should be celebrating the fact that I was a mother. But, the fact that I didnt feel like a mother was hard to overcome. Even though I know that I am a mother, I didnt feel like one because I dont have my son here with me. I know that I am pregnant. I know that I gave birth to a child. I know all that, but man, it was hard. During those moments, I wished with all my heard that Jarrett was right next to me. Daniel came in the room with Bentley and said that they have something for me. I was initially a little upset because I told Daniel that I didnt really want anything for Mothers Day, because I knew that it wouldnt make me feel better. But, I sat up and let him give me a hug. He talked to me and encouraged me. Then he gave me a card from Bentley. It was the cutest thing ever. It had a dog on the front of it, and said "Thank you for being my playmate, my snuggler, and my 'Mom' " and on the inside, "I am the luckiest dog in the world!" It was signed by his paw print!! Lol. Daniel said that he tried to put mud on Bentleys paw, and then stamp it on the card. But, he said it wouldnt stick so he just traced his paw. It was the cutest thing ever! I loved it. Then he gave me a card from him. It was very, very sweet. I love my husband so much! He truly made Sunday so much easier for me. I said a prayer to the Lord: "I know that this is going to be a hard day for me, but, I know that if I can just rely on you, you will help me through it." And He did. Without the Lord and Daniel, it would have been so much harder for me. At church, all of the Dads handed out roses to their wives (and the other men handed them out to the single moms). You get a rose for each child and when Daniel came over to where I was sitting with two roses, I completely broke down. I can still feel how I felt at that moment right now, and I am crying again. I cant even explain how I felt at the moment. I knew that I would be so much harder for me if I wasnt carrying another baby right now. I love this child so much already, and I am so grateful that in 6 months I will be holding another baby in my arms. Daniel kneeled down and let me cry on his shoulder. I didnt care who saw me, I just bawled my eyes out. Afterwards, Daniel spoke to me softly again, telling me that I am the most wonderful mother in the world. He made me feel so much betther. I am not gonna pretend that the rest of the day was great, but, it did get easier. He took me out to eat becuse I really didnt want to do a whole lot. But, I am glad that the day is finally over and next year I know that it will be so much easier for me.
Well, Mothers Day for me was very hard. Jarrett died on the 8th of January, so the 8th of every month has been hard. So the fact that Mothers Day fell on the 8th didnt help things at all. I woke up feeling very depressed. Daniel was already up when I finally woke up, so I just laid in the bed and cried and cried. I was overcome by feelings of grief. I wanted Jarrett in my arms so bad! I knew that this was a day that I should be celebrating the fact that I was a mother. But, the fact that I didnt feel like a mother was hard to overcome. Even though I know that I am a mother, I didnt feel like one because I dont have my son here with me. I know that I am pregnant. I know that I gave birth to a child. I know all that, but man, it was hard. During those moments, I wished with all my heard that Jarrett was right next to me. Daniel came in the room with Bentley and said that they have something for me. I was initially a little upset because I told Daniel that I didnt really want anything for Mothers Day, because I knew that it wouldnt make me feel better. But, I sat up and let him give me a hug. He talked to me and encouraged me. Then he gave me a card from Bentley. It was the cutest thing ever. It had a dog on the front of it, and said "Thank you for being my playmate, my snuggler, and my 'Mom' " and on the inside, "I am the luckiest dog in the world!" It was signed by his paw print!! Lol. Daniel said that he tried to put mud on Bentleys paw, and then stamp it on the card. But, he said it wouldnt stick so he just traced his paw. It was the cutest thing ever! I loved it. Then he gave me a card from him. It was very, very sweet. I love my husband so much! He truly made Sunday so much easier for me. I said a prayer to the Lord: "I know that this is going to be a hard day for me, but, I know that if I can just rely on you, you will help me through it." And He did. Without the Lord and Daniel, it would have been so much harder for me. At church, all of the Dads handed out roses to their wives (and the other men handed them out to the single moms). You get a rose for each child and when Daniel came over to where I was sitting with two roses, I completely broke down. I can still feel how I felt at that moment right now, and I am crying again. I cant even explain how I felt at the moment. I knew that I would be so much harder for me if I wasnt carrying another baby right now. I love this child so much already, and I am so grateful that in 6 months I will be holding another baby in my arms. Daniel kneeled down and let me cry on his shoulder. I didnt care who saw me, I just bawled my eyes out. Afterwards, Daniel spoke to me softly again, telling me that I am the most wonderful mother in the world. He made me feel so much betther. I am not gonna pretend that the rest of the day was great, but, it did get easier. He took me out to eat becuse I really didnt want to do a whole lot. But, I am glad that the day is finally over and next year I know that it will be so much easier for me.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
AAAAAAHHHH!!!
10 weeks 6 days
I cannot believe that I will almost be done with the first trimester! Can you believe it??? Im so freakin excited!!! Like seriously!!!! I should probably calm down a little though because I know that I still have a long way to go. But AAAAAAAHHH!!! I will be 11 weeks tomorrow!! Already!!!! Yay me!!! On the pregnancy note, I still feel pretty good. Once I get past the morning I start to feel better as far as the nausea goes. I take Zofran immediately when I wake up so I imagine that it could be a little worse if I wasnt. I still havent thrown up yet, thank God. WAH??? Could I possibly have been skipped when the morning sickness doom was passing over all the pregnant women??? Guess we'll see. This pregnancy is definitely different than last time with Jarrett. Like, around this time I was just so sick! This time Im just realllly fatigued ALL the time! Its ridiculous! *sigh, patiently waiting for the second trimester energy*
Welp, I quit my job!!!!
B was getting unbareable. I turned in my resignation the day after my last post. She took it way too well and told me that I could even just finish out the next week instead of doing a full two weeks. It seems that she must have wanted me gone, because she was like a completely different person afterwards!!! Like, at one point, while she was standing next to me talking, she reached out and touched my shoulder and get this....SMILED at me!!!!! I was like oh wow, she doesnt have fangs after all.
My mom said that she really must have wanted to get rid of me because I was considered a liability since I am pregnant and stuff. B even told me that after I have that baby the I am more than welcome to come back!
HMMM...thats gonna be SUCH a tough decision to make!!! WHATEVER!!!
I did actually like working there, (just not for her). The new GSS that she hired was NOT doing so well. Everyone kept coming up to me, begging me to stay cuz the new girl was messing up their scheduling books and stuff. My favorite manager even said she wishes I could stay. My last day was this past Saturday, and everyone gave me hugs and told me they would miss me and wanted to make sure that I send them baby shower invites. (The esthetician made me promise to come back for a brazilion wax when its close to have the baby, lol) I cried a little bit when I left because I was thinking how it sucked to be forced to leave a job that I actually enjoyed because of a trifling manager who has a heart of stone! Loser!
I will be looking for other jobs, cuz I need to keep busy to keep my mind off worring so much about this baby. I love him/her so much already! Its kinda been a little hard lately because I can remember this time with Jarrett so well and it makes me sad that he isnt here. I was sort of dreading Mothers Day. I just didnt yet know how I was going to feel yet on that day. I guess maybe I didnt feel like a mother since I am not taking care of a baby at the moment. But on happier days, I get joy out of knowing that I am a mother. A good one. I took care of my first born while I carried him. I labored with him, and pushed him out in four good pushes. I was by his incubator doing everything for him I was allowed to, as long as I was allowed to. When he was in pain, I soothed him the best that I could. Although he never got to use it, I pumped exclusively for him. Through painful, horrific engorgement and a horrible bout of thrush from using a cloth breast pad. I would stand in the shower bawling as I let the hot water run over my painfully engorged breast, refusing to give up pumping because of the hope that maybe, just maybe, one day he will drink the milk my body made just for him. I loved my child with all of my heart, body and soul. And now I am carrying another chance to pour out my love. I AM a mother!
I cannot believe that I will almost be done with the first trimester! Can you believe it??? Im so freakin excited!!! Like seriously!!!! I should probably calm down a little though because I know that I still have a long way to go. But AAAAAAAHHH!!! I will be 11 weeks tomorrow!! Already!!!! Yay me!!! On the pregnancy note, I still feel pretty good. Once I get past the morning I start to feel better as far as the nausea goes. I take Zofran immediately when I wake up so I imagine that it could be a little worse if I wasnt. I still havent thrown up yet, thank God. WAH??? Could I possibly have been skipped when the morning sickness doom was passing over all the pregnant women??? Guess we'll see. This pregnancy is definitely different than last time with Jarrett. Like, around this time I was just so sick! This time Im just realllly fatigued ALL the time! Its ridiculous! *sigh, patiently waiting for the second trimester energy*
Welp, I quit my job!!!!
B was getting unbareable. I turned in my resignation the day after my last post. She took it way too well and told me that I could even just finish out the next week instead of doing a full two weeks. It seems that she must have wanted me gone, because she was like a completely different person afterwards!!! Like, at one point, while she was standing next to me talking, she reached out and touched my shoulder and get this....SMILED at me!!!!! I was like oh wow, she doesnt have fangs after all.
My mom said that she really must have wanted to get rid of me because I was considered a liability since I am pregnant and stuff. B even told me that after I have that baby the I am more than welcome to come back!
HMMM...thats gonna be SUCH a tough decision to make!!! WHATEVER!!!
I did actually like working there, (just not for her). The new GSS that she hired was NOT doing so well. Everyone kept coming up to me, begging me to stay cuz the new girl was messing up their scheduling books and stuff. My favorite manager even said she wishes I could stay. My last day was this past Saturday, and everyone gave me hugs and told me they would miss me and wanted to make sure that I send them baby shower invites. (The esthetician made me promise to come back for a brazilion wax when its close to have the baby, lol) I cried a little bit when I left because I was thinking how it sucked to be forced to leave a job that I actually enjoyed because of a trifling manager who has a heart of stone! Loser!
I will be looking for other jobs, cuz I need to keep busy to keep my mind off worring so much about this baby. I love him/her so much already! Its kinda been a little hard lately because I can remember this time with Jarrett so well and it makes me sad that he isnt here. I was sort of dreading Mothers Day. I just didnt yet know how I was going to feel yet on that day. I guess maybe I didnt feel like a mother since I am not taking care of a baby at the moment. But on happier days, I get joy out of knowing that I am a mother. A good one. I took care of my first born while I carried him. I labored with him, and pushed him out in four good pushes. I was by his incubator doing everything for him I was allowed to, as long as I was allowed to. When he was in pain, I soothed him the best that I could. Although he never got to use it, I pumped exclusively for him. Through painful, horrific engorgement and a horrible bout of thrush from using a cloth breast pad. I would stand in the shower bawling as I let the hot water run over my painfully engorged breast, refusing to give up pumping because of the hope that maybe, just maybe, one day he will drink the milk my body made just for him. I loved my child with all of my heart, body and soul. And now I am carrying another chance to pour out my love. I AM a mother!
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