AAAAAAHHHH!!!

10 weeks 6 days
I cannot believe that I will almost be done with the first trimester! Can you believe it??? Im so freakin excited!!! Like seriously!!!! I should probably calm down a little though because I know that I still have a long way to go. But AAAAAAAHHH!!! I will be 11 weeks tomorrow!! Already!!!! Yay me!!! On the pregnancy note, I still feel pretty good. Once I get past the morning I start to feel better as far as the nausea goes. I take Zofran immediately when I wake up so I imagine that it could be a little worse if I wasnt. I still havent thrown up yet, thank God. WAH??? Could I possibly have been skipped when the morning sickness doom was passing over all the pregnant women??? Guess we'll see. This pregnancy is definitely different than last time with Jarrett. Like, around this time I was just so sick! This time Im just realllly fatigued ALL the time! Its ridiculous! *sigh, patiently waiting for the second trimester energy*
Welp, I quit my job!!!!
B was getting unbareable. I turned in my resignation the day after my last post. She took it way too well and told me that I could even just finish out the next week instead of doing a full two weeks. It seems that she must have wanted me gone, because she was like a completely different person afterwards!!! Like, at one point, while she was standing next to me talking, she reached out and touched my shoulder and get this....SMILED at me!!!!! I was like oh wow, she doesnt have fangs after all.
My mom said that she really must have wanted to get rid of me because I was considered a liability since I am pregnant and stuff. B even told me that after I have that baby the I am more than welcome to come back!
HMMM...thats gonna be SUCH a tough decision to make!!! WHATEVER!!!
I did actually like working there, (just not for her). The new GSS that she hired was NOT doing so well. Everyone kept coming up to me, begging me to stay cuz the new girl was messing up their scheduling books and stuff. My favorite manager even said she wishes I could stay. My last day was this past Saturday, and everyone gave me hugs and told me they would miss me and wanted to make sure that I send them baby shower invites. (The esthetician made me promise to come back for a brazilion wax when its close to have the baby, lol) I cried a little bit when I left because I was thinking how it sucked to be forced to leave a job that I actually enjoyed because of a trifling manager who has a heart of stone! Loser!
I will be looking for other jobs, cuz I need to keep busy to keep my mind off worring so much about this baby. I love him/her so much already! Its kinda been a little hard lately because I can remember this time with Jarrett so well and it makes me sad that he isnt here. I was sort of dreading Mothers Day. I just didnt yet know how I was going to feel yet on that day. I guess maybe I didnt feel like a mother since I am not taking care of a baby at the moment. But on happier days, I get joy out of knowing that I am a mother. A good one. I took care of my first born while I carried him. I labored with him, and pushed him out in four good pushes. I was by his incubator doing everything for him I was allowed to, as long as I was allowed to. When he was in pain, I soothed him the best that I could. Although he never got to use it, I pumped exclusively for him. Through painful, horrific engorgement and a horrible bout of thrush from using a cloth breast pad. I would stand in the shower bawling as I let the hot water run over my painfully engorged breast, refusing to give up pumping because of the hope that maybe, just maybe, one day he will drink the milk my body made just for him. I loved my child with all of my heart, body and soul. And now I am carrying another chance to pour out my love. I AM a mother!